Awake Alone Again

Saturday September 20,2014

So my story still so eagerly to unfold, with mounds of written ideas and thoughts from years of insomniac-tic behavior. 32 years old, feeling as if my mind is overloaded with urges from trigger words. The words spoke in conversation among people, either friends, or unknown spectators. These trigger words are some form of irritant bringing up anger, jealousy or completely making you smile and laugh. So for me an insomniac woman with a trigger word can cause serious brain overload.

So, unconcerned with proper grammar or punctuation. I will ramble but clearly for my whole purpose. Well and honestly I can’t”\’t find a speech to text app to download to .

So I can’t sleep again and it could be the over whelming notion that I am to much for my own brain to handle. I cant stop circling all my thoughts, dissecting each angle feeling each outcome. It’s torture on my brain. Growing up and slowly realizing my faults, made it easier to manage.

Sleeping was a heavenly dream as I aged. So blah,  Coping hasn’t always been easy.

I think, think, think until I am blue. I can’t possibly get all the information out to you or to anyone. I want so much to have a clone to be each one of me I know I can be.

I often ask people I meet “If you can have one thing to help you in life what would it be?

now keep in mind if anyone reading this has ever been in my presence….ummm……well I’v heard I’m to aggressive, rude, forcing people to step outside there comfort zone.

Maybe that’s why I am Alone and Awake. I can’t concentrate on any one topic. I have ideas every 3 seconds.



Digital Destruction of Socialization

The power that is created by innovations in the IT world has raised new questions into the ethical conduct of computing. Philosophers, Computer Scientists and Technical Experts are all discussing ethical concerns in great depth.  Computer Ethics, Cyberethics and forms of Macroethics are being explored.  New developments in technology are adding additional dimensions to previous problems.


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The power that is created by innovations in the IT world has raised new questions into the ethical conduct of computing. Philosophers, Computer Scientists and Technical Experts are all discussing ethical concerns in great depth.  Computer Ethics, Cyberethics and forms of Macroethics are being explored.  New developments in technology are adding additional dimensions to previous problems.

Previous guidelines on ethical behavior for the digital world are inadequate and lack proper foundations.

The advancements in communications through convergence and globalization makes sharing knowledge possible around the world. The emerging popularity of mobile computing, e-commerce and social networking only adds a complex set of variables when dealing with ethics.


Effy Oz has written many books on information technology and  in his book,  Ethics for the Information Age, he wrote, “ Right and wrong depends on the society and the time in which we live.” (E. Oz.1993) The statement expressing the need for standards relating to ethics and the changing world of information technology.


The Computer Security Digest 16.2, written in June 1998, touches on key ethical issues in the IT world.  Among the list are topics such as Privacy, Safety, and Piracy.  The most common of the three is Piracy.  For each software program sold, developers claim that another two to five copies are ‘bootlegged”.(Ethical issues.1998).


The anonymous writer also discusses Data Security and Data Integrity as areas of concern, especially in relevance to databases. Database owners store sensitive and personal information such as arrest reports, credit ratings, debt information and medical documentation. (Ethical issues.1998).   Highlighting the importance of comprehensive, accurate and timely processing of data as an obligation. Competence also on the list suggesting the need for research and development to stay in sink with rapid growth in computers as a whole.


Other ethical issues to consider are Honesty, Loyalty and Fairness. These topics are difficult to process ethically, due to fluctuation in beliefs, societal abnormalities,  morals and economic resources.  The technology world calls for ethical reflection before consequences become visible.

Ethical issues. (1998). Computer Security Digest, 16(2), 3-5.

Retrieved from

The idea of micro and macroethics

Along with the themes of integrity and Rightdoing, another set of ideas has increasingly come under discussion in research ethics, that of the distinction between micro and Macroethics. Microethics refer to those activities that occur between individuals, and this has historically been a major focus in ethics training.  Macroethics refers to activities that involve larger group and societal interactions. Given the increasingly complex role of research in our society, it makes sense to enlarge our exploration of research integrity to take in macroethics.

As an example, suppose we are working on a project measuring changing acidity levels in a series of lakes. The objective reporting of data to a research supervisor would be an example of Microethics. But when we begin to consider the larger responsibilities of the research group to scientific knowledge, to the industries located near the lakes and to the public, this is Macroethics.

This idea of a dual level of ethical concern is an expansion on the idea of integrity: but we can see how Virtue Ethics continues to be part of the picture. In addition, the Kantian approach of fulfilling obligations applies, as does the Utilitarian stance of looking at the consequences as our means for defining “right action.” Increasingly, researchers are thinking about the macro ethics aspect of integrity in their work. Interestingly enough, this again brings up the issue of ambiguity: using the above example of the research into acidity levels, can we be 100% sure of the exact role of industrial waste in the changing acidity of a lake system? And this brings up as well another critical issue in research: should we publish our results before we are 100% certain of the whole picture? What is Rightdoing here?

“In short, Macroethics is the study of ethical systems appropriate to complex adaptive systems, in particular, those global integrated human/natural systems that are characteristic of the anthropogenic Earth. This is the ‘macroethical gap,’ for how to formulate ethical structures adequate for such challenges has yet to be effectively addressed…Thus the choice of the process by which the individual becomes engaged in dialogue with the system…is what becomes ethically critical…Free will and ethical responsibility in complex systems such as the Everglades thus becomes less of a point function, and more of a networked function spread over multiple spatial and temporal scales. Just as quantum mechanics did not obsolete Newtonian physics, but relegated it to a limited space (e.g. interaction of macro bodies), the traditional concept of free will is thus not obsolete, but is a bounded part of a much more complex, systems-based phenomenon.”
Allenby, Brad.  Micro and Macroethics for an Anthropogenic Earth.” Professional Ethics Report, AAAS, Spring 2005.  p.1-2.

Scribbled Memoirs

∼From the Writing Vault∼
Tattered Love Notes & Scribbled Memoirs
As I look into the mirror, I see my face,
My tear stained skin bloody patches of emotions
Just take my world and kill my spirit.
I looked down my nose between my broken glasses, a crushing smell of vulnerability.
When I pieced together each shattered part of the hourglass, tasteless blood rattled my tongue.
I could not spit,
Sweet and Sour lingered long and haunted my senses.

Rock….Solid…..Hidden deep in the covering of morning fog. Holding up the ground and shifting earth in directions of magnetic connectivity. Below the earth is a sturdy appearance, but listening quietly you can hear the air leaking out, as air and soil and feet are smushed together. Soil as rich with emotion. Water, rain ,tears all flowing over time and through the ages. 
A jagged rocks at times seemed to stick out, jagged and rough, each layer peeling back exposed ground weeping with age. The deeper the hole the quicker I feel the rushing waters, tumbling under-ground. At times the silent hole seems to swallow me as I dig, deeper.  Digging clumps of moist earth until the cracks of my hole split open as to let me into a secret underground oasis. 

Definition of a word…

Definition of a word…

What Is Insomnia? Insomnia is a type of sleep disorder that can exhibit itself in any number of ways including varying levels of sleeplessness. A person might experience insomnia as disturbed sleep, restless sleep, difficulty in falling asleep, complete wakefulness for an extended time, or a reduction in the number of hours of sleep. For some people, insomnia occurs on an intermittent basis while…

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A girl named Poetry 20 years ago……


Personal interpretations……….

Touching, Reaching, Understanding

The connection to a memory simplified with a single WORD


20 years ago,  at age 13…..

Reflections of my Adolescent Youth….

long before Technology

I had a friend named Pen…